The Beginning

It was a beautiful late afternoon. So beautiful that I can still feel the heat and every moment of that time. The restaurant was amazing, the food was wonderful and the man in front of me looked so flawless that I felt so shy to be sitting at the same table with him.

He made sure I felt comfortable at that moment. After spending the last night together and he was leaving that afternoon, I decided to put aside my rights and wrongs and spent the day before his departure with him.

Man : And so? What are you thinking?

Me : Nothing. Just felt happy. I didn't thought I would be sitting here with you.

Man : Why is that? You don't want to be here with me?

Me : I am sorry to tell you this. I am with someone else..you are just my one nightstand. Besides you are not my type.

Man : What? Are you saying your someone else is better looking than me? That is weird.

Me : No..I didn't mean it that way.

Man : You are not my type too. I prefer thin and blonde women.

He chuckled. I gave him my squinted eyes look.

Man : Do you love your boyfriend?

I took a long pause. Stared at my wine glass. Fighting in my mind, whether I should be telling the truth to a stranger that I just had two or maybe three nights with. Somehow he had this look on his face, the look that makes me want to pour my heart out to him. Finally I spoke.

Me : He is not here. We were together for two years and he left almost 8 months now.

Man : So you waiting for him?

Me : Yes. We are getting married.

Man : Do you love him?

Me : He loves me. A lot.

And for the next few minutes, I was elaborating certain events and incidents of my relationship that I knew was not making sense at all. He had a smirk on his face. I will never forget that mischievous smile.

Man : You are telling me that you marrying a man that you don't love. Why are you doing that?

Me : I like him a lot. Love can come after marriage. Yes, I hope it will be different way and it will not happen. I feel the burden already just thinking about marrying him but right now he is the only man that ready for commitment.

Man : Marry because you love the man not because you feel sorry for him.

I looked into his eyes. Somewhere at the back of my mind, I wanted to say something to justify my decision. But I let it go.

Me : You have a girlfriend back home anyway. How is she?

The man looked at me. My question didn't seem to make him feel uneasy at all. Seemed like it is a natural question he always get. And for the next few minutes, he told me everything about his girlfriend. How they first met. How was their first kiss. Where they first made out.

His story fascinated me so much. I smiled and took another sip of the wine.

Me : So you will be with your girlfriend and I will be waiting for the man that I don't love to come back and marry me.

Man : Yes, seems so.

I smiled and looked at my hands. He just kept staring at me. With that little smile on his face.

Man : And so? What happens now?

I looked up. Trying to understand that question.

Me : Nothing happens.

I threw a nervous laugh. He still smiles.

Man : Hey, I don't know why I feel so comfortable with you. You have such beautiful eyes.

Me :Really? I am comfortable with you too. But we are not supposed to be like this.

Man : And so? What happens now?

I swore to God, I felt so shaken that I wanted to scream. I kept smiling nervously. Looking around at the restaurant that is now almost empty.

I didn't answer him and we kept talking about other things. Each time he said something new, I felt more and more amazed with him.

Me : You are a very smart. Do you travel a lot?

He smiled and told me the stories of his parents taking him to travel from young age and how he outdid his sister in IQ test.

Me : You are very interesting and I am very impressed. You can teach me a lot of things. I love to learn about things and cultures.

Man : Sure, I can teach you. Hey, there are playing my favorite music.

He started to sing to the song. I laughed and sipped my wine again.

Man : They are very famous in my country. I listened to them when I was very young.

Me : Your taxi will be here soon?

He looked at his watch.

Man : Yeah, in few minutes.

Me : Okay, so when are you coming back?

Man : In three weeks or one month. You will see me when I come back?

Me : I don't know. We will see.

Man : And so now? What happens?

That was it. I knew what was happening. I had to find a way out.

Me : You have a girlfriend. I have a boyfriend. We go back to our lives and we will be meeting here every now and then when you come back because I live here. So nothing happens!

Man : You think so?

Me : Yes.

Man : Hey, do me a favor.

Me : What favor?

Man : Don't marry him if you are not sure. Especially if you don't love him. He cannot force you to be with him. Nobody can force you to do anything. You do whatever you want because it is your life. You understand that?

I knew I was trapped. His words made so much sense that I started to wonder if I was already infatuated by him.

Me : Your taxi is here.

Man : Oh yeah, so I will text you when I arrive?

Me : Sure.

We stood up and walked out from the restaurant. The blue executive taxi was in front of the lobby and the driver put his luggage at the back.

He hugged me and kissed me on my cheeks. We said goodbye and I waited until he disappeared with the taxi.

I walked to my car. Looking down at my dress that I wore from last night, I smiled. I looked up at the skies, I smiled. I opened my car and sit inside, still smiling.

That was the beginning of everything. Little did I know that it was also a beginning of me messing up my life.